gangs + weapons + me

midnight.

imagine being stuck in the middle of THIS:

alright it wasn't as brutal as that la (couldn't find a better picture hahaha), but still, it was scary.


people wearing helmets, screaming and shouting in a language i hardly understood, carrying hockey sticks and weapons.


i was like wth???!!!


like helloooooo, why here?!!




okay so i was in the car (not mine, the company's car), just coming home from work. i've got absolutely nothing to do with them, why must they bother me?! or my driver?!

morons.



blocking our way, stopping the car, banging on the windows, and one of them bloody OPENED THE PASSENGER DOOR!!!




wtf wtf wtf wtf wtf wtf wtf wtf wtf wtf wtf wtf wtf wtf wtf



was he trying to get in?!!! WHAT'S THEIR FREAKIN PROBLEM??!!!




well fortunately the driver sped off in time la (yea, with the door opened, like some sort of action movie)


but seriously, where could he drive to la? we had to go back there, coz that's where he's supposed to drop me.


yea so in the end he had to park his car at a corner, make sure that no one's near at that time, then i had to run all the way to my house. yes, RUN.

-__-


sick.







you know that feeling when your heart beats so fast you feel like it's gonna pop out of your chest, and all kinds of horrible thoughts start flooding your mind, and you open your mouth to speak but nothing comes out, and you can't stop your body from shaking so terribly, and tears just fill your eyes but you can't cry. yea..



haiz.

-

as imperfect as it was,



it was REAL.



it was fucking REAL.





SO FUCKING REAL.

*shrugs*

lotsa things un-said and un-done.



lotsa plans that were never carried out.



lots that had always been there but never actually seen.



*shrugs*

byebye work :)

I QUIT!!!

how often do you get to say that? hahahaha! :)


now how on earth do you write a resignation letter?

hahaha what an unusual feeling, thinking about this letter.

(okay i probably sound crazy, but seriously, it does feel unusual!)

anywayz, i'm saying goodbye to Citibank. work has been crazy lately and every day i have to drag my feet to work.

i used to love work. at least it kept me occupied. and it's nice being around a whole bunch of fun people rather than sitting alone at home. but after they (kononnya) downsized our department, it's just crazy. with people from every corner wanting a piece of you.

i shall not get into the details.

whatever. i'm happy to be leaving.

BUT what the hell am i supposed to do for the next 2 months??? o_O

never got a chance to go for a real holiday with friends.

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...

just wanna go somewhere.

...

it isn't easy putting yourself out there only to get bruised over and over again.




but i'm still doing it.




for one reason.

why am i not running away from what i've always feared?

kepala-heavy

i've been flooding my brain with too much medical related info.

cannot tahan.

there's so much info sumbat-ed into my head, but i still feel unprepared!!!

HELP.

i'm gonna be grilled.

ergh. :(

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

my bro kept walking around the house singing enrique's "do you know". the whole day.

just this ONE line from the song.

"do you know what it feels like loving someone who's in a rush to throw you away"

........................

now it's stuck in my head.

........................

how appropriate.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

my butt hurts. and my leg. gone.

singapore, here i come. again.

stupid cement

what an eventful morning.


woke up (for the 4th time actually) still feeling sleepless (as always), dragged my butt to the bathroom, and yadayadayada...


went downstairs for breakfast. i just stuffed a spoonful of bihun into my mouth when i was asked to carry some stupid cement outside. yes, cement. don't ask me why, it's been there for quite some time already. nobody else could do it (and for some reason they think i'm superwoman) so i went.




it was like over 30 fucking kilogrammes la!!!


BLOODY HEAVY!




please be reminded that i was still groggy and wasn't even halfway done with breakfast, hence the incredible energy level.



i managed to carry the stupid cement till about 2 metres away, then TADAAAAA!!
i slipped. -__-"

(the floor was wet la)



the best part:
the whole freaking 30 kilogrammes landed gracefully on my left leg!!!



so teruk man. had to wait for people to remove the stupid cement before i could even move.

STUPID CEMENT.



my butt doesn't hurt THAT bad la. cushion-y ma. but my leg, aiyooooooooooooooooooooooooo. can't even move it without feeling the pain.


second best part:
i have exams and interviews tomorrow morning!!! (yes, the BIG day)


supposed to go to singapore today. but now so cacat. and tomorrow i'm supposed to walk around (bus station, mrt station, nus, blablabla) in heels and skirt with a limp. -__-"

sigh sigh sigh.

stupid cement!

...

i'm tired.

physically. and mentally. and emotionally.

i'm just so tired.

ABC

(i just came back to malaysia! will talk about the interview in another post)

i saw this in a bookstore. me likes this.

• Absolutely adore each other
• Be best of friends
• Compromise
• Discover new things
• Encourage each other
• Forgive and forget
• Gaze into each other's eyes
• Hold hands and hug a lot
• Inspire and intrigue each other
• Joke and laugh and have fun
• Kiss kiss kiss
• Love with all your heart
• Marvel at each other's talent
• Nurture each other's soul
• Overcome problems together
• Play games
• Quiet each other's fears
• Remember the little things
• Say "I love you" everyday
• Take time for tenderness
• Understand and care deeply
• Value everything you share
• Wish on stars together
• Xpress your true feelings
• Yearn for each other's touch
• Zzzzz in each other's arms

*tears* :'(

lovely.

aaaaaaaahhh!

SINGAPORE, HERE I COME!!!

okay i'm off to singapore in a few minutes.

wish me luck!!! :)

i'm nervous as hell. gosh.